Are women really ok if their guy makes less money than them?

Dear Sunny,


The answer depends on the woman and the man...


If it is a woman who has been taught patience and tolerance and who understands that she is the bread winner and not hold it over her mate's head then she will be a woman who can live with her man making less than her. This does not make her a doormat it makes her smart and supportive. She sees the potential in the man who is a student or budding entrepreneur.  What makes her a doormat is seeing that he is NOT trying to do better and staying around waiting on him to change.  On the other hand if she is a woman who has been taught that a man MUST make more in order to be a man. He MUST make more in order to be the head of the house; then she will not be as understanding...that leaves it up to him to show her that he can be just as dedicated as the man who can buy her the dream home. The man with little money may have to be the one that builds it himself.


More importantly than that though,  the man HAS to be secure enough to not let money dictate how he treats his woman or their household. If he is prideful man and allows his pride to get in the way of his better judgement it will end the relationship. Mistreating her because he is uncomfortable with his place in life; I've seen it lots of times. However, if he is a man who can use his skills to up his "net worth" then he's got it made...What skills do I mean... If he's not working he does housework with no complaints. Paint, vacuum, cook, clean and whatever else needs to be done BEFORE she asks or has to hire someone. There is nothing worse than a capable man who won't do anything. Another thing is a real man will never be without a job; he will master a trade (or find a hustle). That trade may not rake in the salary of her job, but it will make his pride dwindle because he has worked hard for the amount of money he's earned.  Soon enough that pride will give way to accomplishment and the accomplishment will give way to continual success. 


What's most important is that even if he doesn't make as much as her, he is still able to provide for her. He should still be able to manage the household (even if it's not shared yet). He should be ok with pooling money to pay for household things (bills, food, etc)... He needs to be willing to work to show her that money isn't everything... 


Or he could just go back to school and live on student loan money lol...just kidding (unless that's his hustle) 

So do all men lie?

Dear 8, 


Truth is, in the words of my dear friend Whitney Houston, HELL TO DA YEAH BOBBY...


But so do all women. Lies are told because sometimes we think we are protecting someone else and other times it's to save our own ass.  Often times we are justified in our lies.  The problem with lies is that you will likely have to tell a followup lie. 


This is the true problem for men...they tend to not be able to keep up with their lies. Those who can keep up tend to get sloppy in their cover up. Women, however, tend to be cunning and calculated in lying. This makes them less apt to get caught up. 


Honest answer...Men lie, Women lie...women just take their time and do it better...




Ms. Speakeasy

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